Wednesday, August 3, 2016

#PrimWMADiary: This is the Truth about World Muslimah Award 2014


[Disclaimer: I am ready to face all the consequences that might be arised by this post. I am standing on my own, although I will be happy if other finalists will stand up and defend me. I am writing this just for the sake of my own feeling, and I don’t want to hurt others neither harm any brands that worked with World Muslimah Award.]

You know that we have ‘See Your Memories’ feature on Facebook, right? Most of the time it reminds you with how alay you were when you first using Facebook. I even got shocked knowing that five or six years ago I once wrote this status: “Ugh, agh, eeehhh, uhuk uhuk.” What was that? Did I burp or something?

Sometimes it also reminds you that one day you can be so wise. Maybe you just knocked your head on something so you make a very meaningful status. But yeah, that doesn’t happen many times. Lol.

Today the feature reminded me that on this date, one year ago, I uploaded a lot of photos from World Muslimah Award. My friends have understood that I usually take looooong time to upload photos on social media accounts. That’s why when we gather, they never ask me to take photos with my camera. If I happened to take photos, they have to remind me to upload every day.

So it was actually common that I just uploaded the photos NINE months after the event. But actually if you are my friends, you should have known that I was mad as hell even months after it. That’s the actual reason why I need to cool myself down before uploading the photos.

I also need another YEAR to reveal what happened in the event. I don’t want to spread fitnah or bad assumptions, it’s just I want to open up and represent the voice of 2014 finalists. You might wondering why it is so hard for me to move on. Actually I had not think about it anymore since some months ago. But, I have to admit that, after all this time I am still patiently waiting for something that yet to be happened. Yes, you might have guessed that, I haven’t got my prize. Until now.

There was another reason why I feel so disappointed. My very first purpose to join the event was to collaborate with my sisters from all around the world. However, I have to be satisfied as there was no project or whatsoever. We just went back to our hometown after all finished and there is no project after the event. It almost feels like there was nothing happened with the World Muslimah Award. Not that we can’t make our own, but everytime we want to make something, we have to pass the approval of using the brand of World Muslimah Award and so on and so forth.

My second purpose to participate in this event was because I want to win. For me personally it's not something that I should be ashamed for. I realized the other participants are super talented, but when I appointed to be one of the finalists, I thought “okay, I had a chance to be a winner.”

I did my research, I read many books, and I also watched the grand final of World Muslimah Award 2013 to be more prepared. For your information, in 2011, my friend from the same university in Malang won second position; and in 2013, my junior from the same major won favorite winner. That was how I got my confidence.

However, I have to say my trust slowly fading as we moved on day by day. I can't explain much as I'm here not to blame anyone, but I knew – I mean, we all the finalists - knew there was something wrong. Fast forward to the rehearsal, the finalists almost boycotted the coronation night. We just couldn't take it anymore. But everything has set, the show must go on. And yes, we finally made it to the very last day.

Some of you might think that “oh this girl is pathetic, she writes it because she didn't win.” No no, I won Inspiring Muslimah, and for me that is good enough. For this title, I should have went umrah, which I have let go by some months ago. I was grateful for the experience, and yeah, so okay. I am totally okay.

I also got a lot of new sisters who are lovely, funny, and everything that you can ask from a sister. Really. You can read more about my WMA sisters here.

Thus, I am finally being relieved to state that no, you don’t need a crown to be shine. You don’t need a beauty pageant to feel appreciated and respected. You are worthy for whatever you do and whoever you are.


*For refined Indonesian version of my experience in joining World Muslimah Award, you can read here: Beginilah Ternyata Kisah di Balik Gemerlap Kontes Kecantikan yang Perlu Kamu Tahu

**Photos uploaded here courtesy of Masturah (finalist from Singapore), I can’t find mine in this laptop. 

***With all of the respect, I still have a big hope that World Muslimah Award will be improving in years ahead. *finger-crossed*

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